Dear Clinton and Stacy…


I have always loved clothes, though I am not a “fashionista.” When I was little, and we could afford it, my mom dressed me nicely. I can remember owning and wearing what she called a knit purple suit, which meant it was a sweater-type skirt and top. I wore it for everything because Mom “paid $40 for that suit, and you’re wearing it until you outgrow it!” Forty dollars for kids’ clothes was a lot of money in the 1950s.
When I was a teenager, we didn’t have the money for me to buy the Villagers and Weejuns that all the other kids were wearing, and when I was in college, I learned to sew so that I could have more clothes. As I developed into my personhood, I began to shop consignment and thrift so that I could have name brand clothes and more of them.
This brings me to now. Oh Lord, and that’s a prayer. I am pathetic. I still shop consignment and thrift, and I buy something I like, usually because it is different, cheap, and even if it doesn’t particularly fit. (Read, too big.) My circumstances have changed in the past two years.  I am no longer married, I don’t teach school any longer, and  I have moved across country to build a new life. I have no clue what looks good on me, what is attractive for my lifestyle (dog walks, art classes, tutoring) and age (64). Help!
I know you will not surprise me, bring me to New York, give me “the rules,” and send me out with a $5000 shopping budget. But could you please advise me? How should someone like me dress? What would my “rules” be? And how do I develop an appearance that tells the world how I want them to see me?
Okay, so now you know how faithfully I watch you both do wondrous things for women on TLCs What Not to Wear. Can you just give me some general guidelines? If I could feel good about my appearance, gain confidence, and if I turned a few heads, that wouldn’t be so bad either.
Respectfully, submitted,
Retired, Single, and NOT Dead, yet


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