Tag Archives: life’s desires

Tic, Tic, One More Thing Checked off my Bucket List…

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Five-and-a-half years ago, when I was newly single, I decided to make a list of dreams to achieve, desires, as they were.  I called it My Life’s Desires because Bucket List sounded just too, too final.  Then I set out to accomplish said feats, some of which were just plain madness, and some of which were/are worthy of a Bucket List.

Up until that time, I had never lived alone.  I was nearly sixty-three years old.  I was terrified.  I vowed to live by myself for five full years.  So far, I have liked living alone just fine.  I cheat a little bit, though.  For two months of the year, I visit with my family in Wisconsin, and stay at one of my sister’s houses.  This is my sixth summer, and I have my own bedroom, closet of hanging clothes, dresser drawers with more neatly folded clothes, and bathroom with two drawers of cosmetics and all the beauty aids it takes for a woman of a certain age to feel confident enough to go out in public without a huge hat and sunglasses, thank you very much.

Another promise I made to myself was to go on a sister road trip.  My baby sister and my lake friend who is a sister-by-different-parents drove to Indiana a few months after I moved back to North Carolina.  It was a never-to-be-forgotten adventure, where the two of them, grabbed the car keys from my hands at the very first pit stop, relegated me to the back seat, and took over the driving.  We made several unplanned stops at “thrift” stores, talked until our jaws ached, and laughed until we…well, had to stop for facilities.  It was very healing.

Tomorrow, my lake sister and I are taking a road trip once again.  She is accompanying me to Wisconsin.  We have big plans, and I can be sure that most of them will be shuffled around because if anything is sure, it is that we will be casting our fate to the wind (and God, of course).  She will stay for a week, and then she will fly back home.  Meanwhile, I have promised her I will bring back anything she buys there that can’t fit into her suitcase.  We already have big excitement in store before we even leave.  We are carrying her 89 year-old mother-in-law back to her home in Indiana.  I love her mother-in-law nearly as much as I love my friend, and I am grateful to be able to do the transport.

We will have a full car, with belongings of four people.  It’s complicated, but when my sister was down here last fall, she bought a few things like a wooden high chair, Fiesta bowl, and a small wooden wall decoration, plus an entire new wardrobe at Talbot’s.  The Talbot’s things she took home.  The old clothes she left here.  Then there’s my stuff for two months, and my dog and her stuff, and my two guests and their stuff.

In between the first one and this one, there have been other sister road trips with other sisters, including last summer’s that involved the transport of a rescue cat.  There is no way on earth or in heaven that I could have foreseen how exciting, funny, and memorable any of these trips have turned out to be.  That’s why a road trip is an appropriate “life’s desire.”  So, tic, tic.  Another adventure is about to unfold.  That is probably the best desire of all…to be ready for the adventure.

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Some of the stuff of two people, one dog, and a few gifts.  Hoo-boy.

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Road Trip!

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My two Wisconsin sisters came to whisk me back to Wisconsin. They drove hundreds of miles over two days, battling holiday traffic, to spend the weekend in North Carolina. Their usually fourteen hour trip was extended by three hours of the freeway-parking lot experience, and it was all to bring me “home” to the farm for the summer. Isn’t that a gift?

When I first reconfigured my life, I made a list. I didn’t want to call it a “bucket list,” because I was living not dying, so I called it my “life’s desires.” The list was made four years ago, and I have accomplished quite a few things on the list. I made a pilgrimage, landscaped a yard, wrote a blog, and made a road trip with my sisters. Actually, I have made a few of them now.

I have written about my three sisters. Two of us have the same mother, and three of us have the same father. I am in the intersecting oval of the Venn diagram. I am significantly older, from twelve to eighteen years older, than the other girls. We didn’t grow up together, but we are fast adult friends, all of us.

This past weekend was the second time in my life that all of my sisters were together with me. We had a great time doing two of the things we all love to do, shop for a bargain and laugh. It was wonderful. Then our baby sister stayed home to take care of kitties, and we three Remleys drove north, phoning the baby frequently to keep her apprised of our whereabouts.

Our road trips haven’t had the excitement or activity of the ones in the movies. We don’t dally much, and our stops are at restrooms and fast food places, rather than bars or places of interest. We use that time to get ourselves, our family, and the world all straightened out, and to laugh a lot at silly things. We use it to make up for lost time. Perfect.

Stop the clock!

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You know how every now and then, you’d like to time to freeze?  I call those moments “memory photos.” 

Here is a bit of the back-story…I have three half-sisters.  Two sisters are my dad’s other girls, and one is my mom’s other daughter.  I am the oldest.  One of my life’s desires was for my sisters to meet each other, and that happened when I moved east, and my life opened up.

My closest-in-age sister is visiting me from Wisconsin, and we went with Sister Number 3 to hang out.  Number 3 took us to “her” park to share her special place with us, and to walk off a really good lunch.

The weather was picture perfect.  The day was crisp and sunny.  The leaves on the trees were autumnal…gloriously colored against our Carolina blue sky.  We wandered through the park, and landed in a peripheral memorial area.

The three of us sat in a wonderfully crafted iron swing, and I was the filling of a sister sandwich.  Receiving love is something I’ve been working on.  A year ago, I would have been overwhelmed and in tears.  Now, I  soak up the love. Now, I rejoice in these moments. And now, I have a new life’s desire…that Sister Number 2 can join us one day.  I felt the hole of her missing self. 

My dream is that one day, the four of us can squeeze on one bench, and I will be surrounded by my sisters.  Then I will say, “Oh!  Stop the clock!”